Police Beat - April 2, 2012

  • Written by Compiled by Maggie Inahara from City of Woodinville Police Reports

Hunger Games

While working up a mighty appetite at a gym in the 18600 block of Woodinville-Snohomish Road, a McBurglar broke the victim’s car window and stole his lunch box from inside.

This was, indeed, fast food for the crook, as he made a quick getaway with his happy meal, leaving no clues or crumbs behind.  We’re not lovin’ it.

To Xfinity and Beyond!

An identity thief decided to become well-connected in the City of SeaTac by ordering up cable, Internet and phone service using the personal information of a Woodinville resident.

While our communications crook was happily texting, tweeting and TV viewing, the Woodinville victim was not enjoying the bundled bill, in spite of the deeply discounted deal du jour and lightning fast speeds.

Take Me Out To The Ball Game

A Woodinville police officer saw a suspect he knew to have a suspended license driving on the roadway near NE 200th Street and Woodinville-Snohomish Road.  (Strike one)

He turned around to stop him and the truck nearly drove off into the ditch. (Strike two)

The suspect then switched seats with the passenger as the officer approached. (Foul ball)

The driver was arrested and was found to have something greener and leafier than peanuts and crackerjacks in his pocket.  (Strike three)

The vehicle was impounded (we don’t care if he ever gets back) and the driver was fingerprinted and released pending DWLS and marijuana charges.

And that’s the old ball game.

Let me tell you how it will be

There’s one for you, nineteen for me.

’Cause I’m the taxman, yeah, I’m the taxman. Or am I?

The only kind of mail more unpleasant than a bill is a letter from the IRS, especially when that letter claims to be holding your refund check hostage until you supply more information. That situation becomes even more disconcerting when you haven’t filed your tax return yet.  (Or even thought about it)

Our alert taxpayer decided to ask them what they wanted it for (because she didn’t want to pay some more).

Woodinville Police took the fraud report, and we’re thankful the fake taxman didn’t take it all.

Police Beat - March 26, 2012

  • Written by Compiled by Maggie Inahara from City of Woodinville Police Reports

Gonna fly now …

… flying high now ...  getting strong now …won’t be long now … punching soon now …window car now … Our Rocky wannabe decided he didn’t need to go the distance, and called the fight after one punch to a car window in the 13400 block of Little Bear Creek Road.Apollo Creed and the victim are both hoping there will be no need for a rematch.

You Want Fries With That?

A restaurant in the 14200 block of NE Woodinville Duvall Road unwittingly changed its venue to takeout only when thieves shattered the safety glass in the south door of the business to place their orders.  After damaging the alarm key pad, cash drawers and office door, the menu selection was limited to the bread on hand, as in cash. Needless to say, there were no tips left.

We’ll Leave the Light On For Ya …

… but please sleep someplace else!  A homeless transient was found sleeping rough in the Wilmot-Gateway Park. Woodinville police explained the intricacies of parks being for daytime and vertical enjoyment only and verbally trespassed him from the premises sans his continental breakfast and pillow mints.

Paper or Plastic?

A misguided conservationist in the 17300 block of 131st Avenue NE decided that reusable mesh shopping bags would leave the smallest carbon footprint on our fragile planet; However, when one tallies up the time, trouble, expense and resources used to replace the car passenger window broken out to obtain those bags, that footprint is looking decidedly big and sooty. Unfortunately, no actual footprints or clues were left behind.

Police Beat - March 19, 2012

  • Written by Compiled by Maggie Inahara from City of Woodinville Police Reports

High Priced Crime

Three trucks from a business in the 14500 block of NE Woodinville Way had 30 gallons of liquid gold siphoned from the tanks while parked overnight.  O.K., it was gas that was siphoned, but at these prices…

If You Can Read This …

… you are following too closely.  Bumper sticker reading may or may not have been on one driver’s mind, near NE 177th Place and NE 178th Place.  Before he could even find out what the lead car would brake for, there was a loud crunch. This driver definitely had more serious things on his mind after being cited for DUI. Rumor has it that the bumper sticker in question said, “Alcohol and calculus don’t mix. Never drink and derive.”

She’s Baaaaaaaack!

In what sounds like a repeat Police Beat report, an adult female with a face all too familiar to store security was detained at a retail establishment in the 17600 block of Garden Way NE after shoplifting. She did not pass GO, did not collect $200 and was booked into the Snohomish County jail.

A Perfect Day

An electronics aficionado had done his homework and decided upon the perfect computer tablet and cell phone to complement his collection. Even his day was perfectly planned out, as he had a ride waiting for him to bring him home after his acquisitions. The only imperfect part of this picture was that this establishment in the 18000 block of Garden Way NE is not a Grab-N-Go, especially if no effort is made to pay. The other imperfect part of the plan is that the whole thing was caught on surveillance video. A Woodinville detective is reviewing the tape. Here’s hoping that crook’s day goes really downhill.

Police Beat - March 12, 2012

  • Written by Compiled by Maggie Inahara from City of Woodinville Police Reports

Clean Getaway

A couple of trusting souls who had a tendency to leave their apartment door unlocked in the 15900 block of NE 191st Street pushed their luck one too many times:  A larcener with laundry on his mind shanghaied some soap powder along with some rings located just inside the door.  The lathered-up lifter left no other clues behind.

Even Cleaner Getaway

A fast food patron in the 17400 block of NE 175th Street was no match for a wily bike thief who waited until his mark was seated and dining to make a quick getaway with the victim’s mode of transportation. The victim gave chase but had to watch in frustration as the bike nabber and his Beloved disappeared into the sunset.

No, These Aren’t Giveaways

A business in the 19700 block of 144th Avenue NE was victimized by a car parts aficionado who treated the merchandise displayed outside like his personal smorgasbord. The menu that night included radiators and other appurtenances normally reserved for paying customers.  There were no clues or crumbs left behind.

But … Someone Took My Gym Bag

Like the proverbial pushover whose dog ate the homework, a victim in the 16100 block of 125th Place NE has a great excuse for not working out: His gym bag was taken from the unlocked vehicle parked in the driveway.  Looks like this worked out for the thief without even breaking a sweat.

Police Beat - March 5, 2012

  • Written by Compiled by Maggie Inahara from City of Woodinville Police Reports

Magnetic Poles

What is it about utility poles that is so downright irresistible to car bumpers?  In two separate incidents, one in the 15200 block of Woodinville-Duvall Road and the other at the 15500 block of NE 175th Street, the power of attraction could not be overcome, nor denied.

With the marriage of metal to wood consummated, it also appears that both drivers had engaged in a premature toast.

Both were cited for DUI and released.

Frequent Flying Filcher

Like a bad penny that keeps turning up, this ol’ gal who must have been dumber than a bag of hammers, returned to the scene of multiple previous shoplifting crimes in the 13900 block of NE 178th Place for yet more misdeeds.

She was called on the carpet and told she would be busted into the middle of next week lookin’ both ways for Sunday.

In other words, the Woodinville officer is investigating this incident for felony organized retail theft.

Chump Change

A pair of sophisticated safe crackers utilizing state-of-the-art drilling equipment, advanced safe-cracking technology and other finely-honed high-dollar crime skills, descended on a phone booth in the 14100 block of NE Woodinville-Duvall Road.

A coin was removed.

There will be no film at 11.

Going South for the Winter

It’s that time of year when some of us start thinking about what could have been, had we just gone south for the winter: A land where it wasn’t snowing at the end of February … where spring seems more than just a distant dream …

Apparently, a credit card from a victim in the 20200 block of 151st Avenue NE decided to make that last minute sunny dash to the warmer climes of Florida, charging supplies to be delivered there ahead of its arrival.

Alas, the bank brought this wayward card’s spree to an end, stopping all orders in their cold tracks.