Police Beat - January 9, 2012

  • Written by Compiled by Maggie Inahara from City of Woodinville Police Reports

Trespass Jackass

In spite of a plethora of signs stating that trespassers were most unwelcome at a property near the 14400 block of Woodinville Road, a hipster doofus in a blue two-door sports car blew right past the signage and onto the victim’s saturated front lawn.

Satisfied with the ruts he had wrought upon the soaked sod, our misbehaving meddler spun back onto the driveway and headed off into the sunset for more mischief — destination unknown.

Summertime Crime

In what was quite possibly an extreme case of Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD), the dark, rainy and gloomy days of late apparently pushed at least one person over the edge into the land of delusions. Mistaking the shiny surface of the rear window of a car in the 18200 block of 142nd Avenue NE for a solar orb, our hallucinating sun-seeker dove right into the light. Items taken from the vehicle included sunglasses, suntan lotion and the faceplate from the auto’s stereo system — perhaps to be used as a reflective tanning device. With winter barely underway, this beach bum had better get a grip.

Pesky Plunderers

In two separate incidents, one at the 132nd block of NE 171st Street and the other at the 18000 block of Garden Way, the front passenger windows of vehicles were broken out and items taken.  In a third incident at the 13900 block of NE 178th, there was no sign of forced entry to another vehicle, but the doors and trunk were found unlocked by the victim.

Although our victims did everything right by locking the doors and keeping valuables out of sight, a determined thief will make sure they don’t go away empty-handed, taking any available “trophy.”  (Reminds me of the time my mom’s car was broken into and the classic PNW blown-out umbrella was stolen)  No lessons here — just virtual lashes for the lousy larcenist(s).

The Unkindest Cut of All

In a final car crime that goes way beyond pesky, a victim in the 14200 block of NE 181st Street parked his soft-top convertible car in his condo’s parking lot in the evening, only to find that an impromptu chop shop had descended there overnight.

The plunderers cut the cloth roof of the vehicle and made off with the car’s steering column and wheel, car seats, the dashboard instrument unit, plus hand tools.

Kind souls, what, weep you when you but behold, our victim’s vehicle wounded?  Brutus left no other clues behind.

Police Beat - January 2, 2012

  • Written by Compiled by Maggie Inahara from City of Woodinville Police Reports

Break- room Bad

A suspected cat burglar entered the breakroom at the local PetsMart and went through an employee’s bag.

Some of the items snagged included the victim’s wallet and makeup bag.  It was also rumored that inventory counts showed a shortage on the most recent edition of Cat Fancier.

One can only surmise that the bandit made off with the makeup bag in order to perpetrate the following crime under disguise:

Cash Trash

Not satisfied with the previously reported booty, and under heavy makeup camouflauge, Puss-n-Boots went to another Garden Way business and gained entry to a locked office space.

The plunderer plucked several cards from the victim’s wallet and left the purse in a trash can.

Holiday Hat Trick

Having scored at the previous two workplace breakrooms, our feline defalcator (or perhaps a littermate) decided to make it three for three and traversed the parking lot over to Cost Plus to pillage yet another breakroom locker.

This time, those sticky paws absconded with the victim’s debit card and quite possibly some holiday Stollen and champagne flutes, which were up to 50 percent off.

Breaking news: No Shopping Rage

One should never go looking for crime, but this Police Beat reporter thought that if ever there were a place for shopping rage to occur, it would happen at one of the stalwarts of Woodinville holiday shopping’s guilty pleasures: The Day-after Christmas sale at Molbak’s.

Throngs were lined up in orderly fashion awaiting the 0800 opening.

Clerks were stationed at registers with nary a panicked look among them.

The opening bell released an eager, yet restrained crowd.  There was no pushing, shoving, nor grabbing.

Shoppers graciously answered other shopper’s questions on where they might find this or that.

The closest thing that came to registering an annoyance was when one shopper failed to realize the shopping carts had a lower level which juts out further than the top level, and the person in front politely pointed this out to the person who was inadvertently “pushing” her from behind.

Those waiting in line for the cash registers exchanged cheerful banter.

Nope, no need for police assistance at this place — just another reason why I’m so glad to call Woodinville home and why we all love this city.

Here’s hoping for fewer incidents to report and a wonderful new year for all!

Police Beat - Dec. 26, 2011

  • Written by Compiled by Maggie Inahara from City of Woodinville Police Reports

No Gas for YOU!

A  man was finishing up pumping gas at a Kingsgate grocery/gas station, when another potential pumper pulled up in front of his vehicle, nose to nose.

When he had finished, he asked the female driver of the other car to back up a bit so that he could leave.

She refused, stating that he had parked on the “wrong” side of the pump, since his gas tank was on the far side.

Several more attempts at reasoning with her were met with the statement: “I’ll stay here all night if I have to.”

The man gave up, informed the station attendant and left on foot to continue shopping at the grocery store and pharmacy.

When he returned approximately 20 minutes later, the female driver had not budged.

At this point, he noticed that there was a baby in the back seat who had been sitting in the cold car the entire time.

He decided to back out of the spot for the sake of the baby, and left.

Police arrived, and by this time the female driver had pulled in front of another pump and still refused to leave.

She informed police that she was waiting for the man to return so that he could be issued a citation for illegal parking.

She advised the officer: “I’ll stay here all night if I have to.”

The officer gave her the option of leaving right then or being arrested and having her car impounded.

Reason finally prevailed, and our parking Nazi left with the baby on board.

It is unknown if her original mission of filling her gas tank was accomplished.

Auto Come Home

There are few worse ways to ring out the old year than having your car stolen.

Our hapless roisterer had parked his car in an apartment parking lot in the 17100 block of 131st Avenue NE only to find it had gone missing overnight.  Here’s hoping that the New Year brings suitable vehicular restoration for the injured party and righteous wretchedness to the evildoer.


Cover Up Caper

Cat owners out there are familiar with feline litter box routines, whereby the digestive byproducts are first inspected, then discreetly covered up.

A suspected cat burglar in the 12700 block of NE 178th must have forgotten where he left his specimen, as he was seen peering into various vehicles in the parking lot with a flashlight.

His explanation to a witness that he had been urinating backs this theory up.

Unable to locate his excretion and facing further questioning from the witness, our crafty tomcat decided to scat.


No Rest for the Wicked

You would think that burglars might give their craft a breather during the height of the holidays, but in a quest for that last perfect gift, a thief broke out the glass of a back door in the 19400 block of 132nd Ave NE and made off with an iPad and jewelry.  Here’s hoping those burgling ways go auld lang syne in the New Year.

Police Beat - Dec. 19, 2011

  • Written by Compiled by Maggie Inahara from City of Woodinville Police Reports

These Pretzels Are Making Me Thirsty

Recalling a Seinfeld episode where Jerry bemoaned the fact that the true art of TAKING a car rental reservation was, in fact, HOLDING the reservation, the following incident sounds familiar: A customer in the 19200 block of Woodinville-Snohomish Road expertly executed the TAKING of the rental tools but got confused about RETURNING the rental tools.

A detective will follow up with possible theft charges for our Kramer-esque crook.

Too Legible to be True

An enterprising drug seeker hatched a plot to procure prescriptions of the narcotic kind by purloining a prescription pad from her former employer.

The first clue that the Rx was not legitimate was the fact that it was completely legible.

One can only guess at the humungous quantities ordered up as well.

Woodinville police arrived on the scene to ring up the charge for those painkilling pills: Forgery.

Try scribbling next time.

Triple Dog Dare Redux

A driver in the 19500 block of 156th Avenue NE must have taken a previously reported Police Beat incident to heart and decided to settle, once and for all, the question of whether  a car bumper does indeed stick to a pole when contact is made in freezing temperatures.

The official results are in and the answer is negative.  The pole in question went down and the driver was processed for DUI and released.

Ms. Grinch

Here’s another contender for the most epic-sized lump of coal ever to be found in a Christmas stocking: An unknown female suspect stole the tip jar from a business in the 17600 block of 140th Avenue NE  and ran out the door.

Video of the caper was sent to the North Pole.  Guess who’s being added to the “Naughty” list?

Police Beat - Dec. 12, 2011

  • Written by Compiled by Maggie Inahara from City of Woodinville Police Reports

Mall Malaise

Some people will go to incredible lengths to avoid shopping in the malls during the holiday season.

An excellent alternative is to shop locally to support your local retailer and community with the sales tax revenue.

Shopping in the 13900 block of NE 178th Place in particular, will support your local community.  One minor detail is that the aforementioned sales tax must be paid at time of purchase.

If you are seen skedaddling away with your three buddies in a getaway car with your undisturbed wallet snugly in its place, gift items in tow, one has to wonder about your sincerity of supporting your local retailer and community.

These four bad Santas were apprehended shortly after their shoplifting spree thanks to information provided to the Woodinville PD by alert loss prevention employees.

Apparently, these were equal opportunity grubstakers, as goods from multiple retailers were discovered and returned.

Our stingy Scrooges were fingerprinted and released pending misdemeanor theft charges. I know at least four local miscreants who can expect epic-sized lumps of coal in their Christmas stockings this year.

Hot Gifts

Not that you should ever look a gift horse in the mouth, but if you should happen to open up some gifts on Christmas morn’ resembling a slightly used purse, jackets and a child booster seat, there’s a slight chance they were lifted from a couple of vehicles in the 18400 block of Woodinville Snohomish Road.

Mr. Grinch left no other clues behind.

Even If It Is Nailed Down …

… enterprising thieves will find a way to liberate it and recycle it.

These heisters weren’t thinking “Green” in terms of recycling, though. The only green they were thinking about was the cold, hard kind from re-sale.

The lifted items included landscape lights and six copper caps from the patio heaters of a business at the 140000 block of NE 145th Street.

Re-gifting at its Worst

Combining the worst qualities of our bad Santas, recycled gift givers and Grinches, a daughter and her boyfriend absconded with her mother’s jewelry, one piece of which was subsequently located at a local pawn shop.  The items were apparently purloined to feed a very bad habit, which wasn’t shopaholicism. Looks like someone needs a serious New Year’s Resolution.