Police Beat - Sept. 19, 2011

  • Written by Compiled by Maggie Inahara from City of Woodinville Police Reports

Sticky fingers, but not from candy

A woman returned to her auto at a local sports venue for a rude shock akin to the shock of a surcharge at a formerly surcharge-free ATM machine: her purse, including ATM card, checks and other valuables had been lifted.

This was no sophisticated lock picking or crude window smashing entry; in fact, this thief saw easy pickings vis-à-vis an unlocked door. Like a kid in a candy store, this bandit helped themself without even having to deal with the metaphorical tight-fisted screaming baby.

The victim was subsequently notified by her credit card company that the suspect had quickly gone in search of ATMs (more than likely the free kind) and other localities aiming to cash in on the ill-gotten debit and credit devices. The victim duly cancelled all credit cards and checks.

Decorations not included

Obviously not satisfied with the luxury soaps, shampoos, sewing and shoe shining kits offered as a courtesy to their well-heeled guests, a thief apparently took the name of a bronze form to heart when deciding to liberate the “Courtesies” sculpture from a high-end Woodinville restaurant/hotel lobby.  As if it weren’t sorry enough when holiday makers decide to take the unethical route to replenishing their laundry cupboard with lifted linens, this brazen bronze burglar must have had home redecoration in mind, as this easily-recognized piece would be difficult to pass off as anything other than purloined property.

The suspect and sculpture remain at large.

Turn on your heart light

A GPS unit apparently phoned home and was spirited back to the home satellite with its dashboard buddy, a cd player, tagging along. This is one of the conceivable explanations for the disappearance of the digital duo from a locked auto parked in a commercial building parking lot. There was no sign of forced entry, no trail of Reese’s Pieces left behind, nor any sightings of strange silhouettes in the full moon.

Barring any communication from the devices via a psychic connection, we can assume they have, indeed, gone home.

A preference for Heavy Metal

In an act of thievery which is becoming as common as fathers chasing their kids around with power tools, materials of the easily-resold sort went missing from the unfenced yard of a commercial welding company.

With nary a grunt, moan or subliterary lyric, nor any head banging to speak of, the crooks made a clean getaway.

Police Beat - Sept. 12, 2011

  • Written by Compiled by Maggie Inahara from City of Woodinville Police Reports

You can dress me up in diamonds

A well-known Woodinville transient decided to dress up his act in a local retail store and concluded that three particular necklaces provided the polished and accessorized appearance he was hoping for.  Apparently, he was also hoping for a deep discount for his bling, as he was observed pocketing the purloined ornaments and making an exit, stage right.

There was no second act for this parsimonious performer and he was asked to take his bows in the back of a squad car.

But, I didn’t inhale

A local fellow wasn’t feeling the lunch munchies quite yet as the midday hour rolled around, so he engaged in the partaking of a certain herbal substance well known for enhancing the appetite.

The aforementioned appetizer was served up in the comfort and convenience of his auto, with no need for tray table attachment or extra napkins. Alas, the person approaching the vehicle was not on roller skates nor serving up an entrée or root beer float.

As the haze started to clear, the familiar blue uniform and badge revealed that he was about to go on a different type of trip, this time to the police station.

Six-Pack without working out!

You’ve seen the ads: Get those six-pack abs without all the work!

And what is three times as good as that six-pack? That would be an 18-pack — once again without all the work! A woman described as being in her early twenties apparently took this notion to heart, as she was observed pinching an 18-pack of frosty brew from a local mini-mart and exiting without so much as a sit up or crunch — much less flexing a Carpi Radialis or Ulnaris to remove one of those heavy double-sawbucks from her wallet.

Our light-fingered lass’s exit was as smooth and relaxed as most peoples’ stomach muscles and she remains at large.

Urine the wrong place

Some of the country’s finest and most beautiful wineries call Woodinville home.  The beautiful landscaping, the classic architecture, the occasional peacock in a full display of captivating colors.

Combine that with the gorgeous weather we’ve been having, gentle breezes and the sweet smell of summer flowers.  Ah — nature.  And in one fellow’s case, the call of nature.

In spite of this winery’s lovely lavatories for those in need of a rest, our naughty nature boy decided he could not break the spell of the moment, nor make a break for the aforementioned accommodations.

The Garden of Eden may have tolerated this behavior with a wink and a pass, but this particular garden takes a very dim view of people who pee in public places.  Snap out of it, Son!

Next time, take a march to the latrines, or face another charge of indecent exposure.

Police Beat - Sept. 5, 2011

  • Written by Compiled by Maggie Inahara

What’s wrong with this picture?

The only thing more annoying than forgetting where you parked your car is remembering exactly where you parked your car and finding that space between the two neighboring cars as empty as Jacob’s kettle.

As much as this employee of a popular Woodinville dining establishment wanted to believe that there had been some kind of mistake or that he was in the middle of a revolting dream, reality hit like a speeding 18-wheeler: He was the victim of auto theft.

The auto went missing sometime between 1200 hours and 1730 hours.

Barring any postcards from the car vacationing in exotic locations, there are currently no clues as to its whereabouts.


Please don’t drink and dive

A Woodinville driver’s revelry was rudely interrupted with a dive into a ditch. Unable to come up with a plausible explanation for her peculiar choice of a parking spot, Woodinville police decided to administer a breathalyzer test.

Evidence of that evening’s prior partaking of adult beverages was revealed in consecutive readings of .23 and .24 BAC.

The suspect was cited and released, with her car being towed to a safe haven.


Shop here, not there

A shopping trip to a local grocery turned ugly when the victim returned to his/her vehicle to find that another bargain hunter had done some merchandise selection of the non-reimbursable kind from their car.

Although the vehicle had been securely locked before the grocery excursion, the passenger door was now inexplicably unlocked.

A quick inspection of pockets and pouches revealed that the victim’s keys were, indeed, MIA.

With no spare key onboard, the vehicle was once again locked up until the victim could return with the spare in hand.

Upon return, evidence was abundant that the scoundrel had returned for more five finger discounts, once again leaving the vehicle unlocked. The keys remain at large.


Police Beat - August 29, 2011

  • Written by Compiled by Maggie Inahara

Pause for Refreshment

An officer was dispatched to a reported traffic incident, where a bicyclist had been enjoying the first actual days of summer with a leisurely ride along NE Woodinville Road. His reverie was rudely interrupted with the blast of a car horn immediately followed by the launching of a missile comprised of the container and contents of a popular sports-themed beverage. The victim was unable to enjoy the replenishment of water, carbohydrates and electrolytes due to poor aim by the profferer.

The suspect vehicle sped away from the scene to no doubt practice his rehydration therapy on yet another reluctant recipient.

Now you see them, now you don’t

A would-be shopper at a local retail outfit interrupted their acquisition of merchandise with either the call of nature, or the call to practice magic.

The suspect was observed entering a restroom with cargo on board, and after some hocus pocus, was seen leaving said restroom unburdened by any possessions whatsoever. Opting out of the choice of visiting one of the many friendly cashiers available with the choice of paper or plastic, the suspect departed the premises. Alas, this was no disappearing act—just a case of clever concealment of commodities, resulting in a charge of larceny.

Where oh where have my lions gone?

The lion (Panthera leo) is a vulnerable species which currently exists in Sub-Saharan Africa and in Asia, having disappeared from North Africa and Southwest Asia in historic times and most recently from the porch of a home in Woodinville. The decorative duo went missing with nary a trace of the wily catnabber.

Show me the money

Loyal readers of Police Beat have no doubt taken note of the proliferation of prowlers with a penchant for easy pickings in the form of valuables placed well within view of passers-by. With so many forewarned and forearmed denizens of the dell taking precautionary measures of the surreptitious sort, one frustrated prowler resorted to the devining of items most wanted. Alas, these powers proved unprofitable, as no booty was recovered and the car owner was left with a broken window with no one to blame.


Maggie Inahara was born and raised in Seattle and graduated from UW with a bachelor of science degree in civil engineering. She spent 20 years in the Navy Civil Engineer Corps, with duty stations far and wide, including taking part in Operation Provide Comfort — the building of refugee camps in northern Iraq after the invasion of Kuwait (otherwise known as "the first time we were over there). Inahara is currently working for the City of Monroe as managing engineer. Mark and Maggie reside in the part of Bothell that most people think is Woodinville where they share their home with three dogs and one lonely cat.

Police Beat - June 27, 2011

  • Written by Troy Heavener from Woodinville Police reports

June 21: Somebody was out enjoying the recent good weather at a city park.

Before he left to soak up the sunshine, the potential victim put some valuables, including wallet, ID card, cash and a check book into a backpack which was placed securely in the back seat of the car.

He then locked the doors, and left.

Upon return, the passenger window was broken. It probably shouldn’t come as a suprise to learn the backpack and valuble contents were missing.


June 18: Only one thing was taken in this incident — the car. The victim in this one parked in an apartment parking lot. When they went to use the car again, they found it had mysteriously vanished.

The victim told police that the keys were in fact in the ignition — an open invitation for an unknown up-and-coming magician.


The week of June 13 was a busy week for loss prevention officers at a local grocery. On the 14th, a woman was arrested around mid-day.

She had placed several items into her purse and left the store.

Officers searched her and found the cosmetics she had just picked up, as well as some other items people aren’t supposed to carry around.

A few hours later, a person was observed consuming items as they shopped.

When the meal was over and he was leaving the store, the suspect was stopped for not paying.

Four days later, another shoplifting incident — this person was seen on camera hiding in the wine department while stashing merchandise on her person.

It was also a busy week at a department store.

Several incidents in two days were noted here. It seems there may have been a "bumper-car" ring set up. A driver banged into another car while leaving a parking stall. He must have noticed some damage because he indicated he would leave a note for the other driver.

Instead of writing that note, he drove away. The victim here wants to settle the matter "civilly."

The next day a woman noticed a dent in her bumper when she came out of the store.

While she wanted to note the damage in a police report, she didn’t think it necessary to press charges. This may be due to the fact there were no witnesses or suspect information.